Stereotypes II: Sellers

Do you remember when people use to go to the store to buy things?  That trend is pretty much dead.  Whether for better or worse, I have no opinion.  Eventually, it will probably completely die out.  I envision a day when I tell my grandchild that there was a place called "Blockbuster", where I used to rent/buy movies from.  And with a look of sheer disbelief, he/she will say to me, "Grandpa, are you making up stories to cover up the fact you sh$% your pants again?"  Maybe an exaggeration, but probably not.

The internet is not a "new" thing anymore.  Why talk to a microwave expert, when you can just look online and research it?  Then you can pretentiously bring up the fact you know all the specs on a 4-slot toaster at the water cooler tomorrow.  You can buy anything you want from the safety of the Men's Room stall.  Then eBay and Craigslist happened.  Regular people became not only expert consumers, but also expert sellers.  So on and so forth...

This is all well and good.  However, most people are idiots.  What does this mean for us buyers?  Let me show you:

Misinformed

This person is selling a "Gibson Les Paul Special II" for $125.  I assure you, this did not come out of the Gibson factory.  Maybe from the cesspool of expired lacquer that sits behind the factory, but this is in fact, not a Gibson.  I mainly find it odd that despite the fact that in fancy lettering up on the headstock, it says "Epiphone", this person decided it was a Gibson.  But of course, this type of seller never would include a picture of the headstock to confirm that.  This ad also falls into another category:

My Crap Smells Like Roses, Because It Was MY Crap

Do you remember when I sanded a guitar down to its sealer, and tried to sell it with no upgrades for $100 more than I bought it for?  Now you can drag your crusty panties out of the closet and put whatever price you want on it, cause it's got "stock parts".  Everyone wants to buy things for dirt cheap, and sell their stuff for twice the amount they paid, simply because they're magic and they owned it.

Terminology

People come up with the most hilarious adjectives for their stuff when they're selling.  I ran across this listing this morning, and almost died laughing.  What on earth is "swat"?  It sounds naughty.  Dirty.  Like some sort of fluid excreted from the nether regions of a person's body.  Needless to say, I am withholding my money for a "swat"-less guitar.  

Another term I see frequently is "MUST SELL ASAP!!!".  Maybe this is just me, but when I see that title, my brain immediately thinks "cheap".  But when I open the link, low and behold you've got that puppy listed for a pretentiously high price.  You're going to get low balled if you put that in a listing.  If you don't, please FWD me your email so I can low ball you.  

"Upgrades"

This is one that just blows my mind.  

Here's a guitar.  It was $700 new.  They blew them out in stores because they couldn't sell them for around $500.  But wait, he made upgrades.  Let's see *reads* they put $250 of upgrades into it.  Okay that makes $750 low, $950 high.... and they're asking a grand plus shipping.  But that would be if that guitar was new...

If you buy any guitar, from any store and your 30, 60, 90 day return policy goes away, that is now a used guitar.  I don't care how pristine it is or how little you played it, you own a used guitar.  But even more than this, all of my existence wants to smite people who try to sell a used guitar for substantially more than they bought it for.  Yes, there is a vintage market.  But what about stuff in the past 10 - 15 years?  Here's the hard truth.  Upgrades are nice, but they don't raise the value of a guitar much.  If anything, it makes it only slightly more appealing to sell at a reasonable used price.  If you really want to make your money back, you'll sell off the upgrades and try to get what you can for the stock instrument.  

Partscasters

I'm going to tread lightly on this stereotype because it seems to be hit or miss.  I've built up a couple Partscasters.  It's usually some extravagant scheme that will fulfill all my weird niche desires in a guitar, while having an original look and vibe.  I usually finish it, love it for a day, then realize that I've made some sort of ugly bastard guitar child and want to get rid of it ASAP.  I can tell you from experience, if you try to sell the guitar as a complete, you will almost never get what you have into it back out.  That's not to say it won't ever happen, especially if you build up a parts guitar modeled after a very famous retro guitar.  But if you have a super strat, with sustainer pickups, built in fuzz, and misting fan to keep you cool, it's probably not going to happen.  You're actually better off parting it out, that way people can incorporate pieces of your master scheme into their master scheme.  

Relentless Re-Posters

This is not Photoshop magic.  I kid you not, this is what my local CL looks like if you type in "piano".  If you scroll down, they keep repeating each day for a couple months (at least).  It has to be one person too, because these get re-posted in the same blocks of various pianos.  Someone even made a listing to try to get everyone to "Flag" these posts from popping up.  It worked for awhile, but they've crept up again.  I'm sure you've seen em too.  The WORST part about re-posters, is that they're typically unwilling to lower/negotiate price.  There was a guy with an Epiphone Casino on Craigslist a while back (he's actually resurfaced recently) who kept doing this.  I tried to get it from him at one point actually but he was unwilling to budge on price.  Now he's got a "PRICE DROP!!!" tag in the title, and it's -$25 less than he was asking in the first place.  I don't make the rules on selling, but if you haven't sold something for months or a year, you really should reconsider your price.

Now I don't rule the internet.  I don't make the rules.  These are just my observations.  I've been guilty of a few of these.  Let's just remember to turn that ole brain on when we're selling our old toys.  

- Stonewall

Stonewall Approved Gadgets #1: Electro Harmonix Cathedral

Long ago, when Stonewall's Guide was still gestating within the folds of my brain, I decided that I wanted to provide a resource to fellow musicians/nerds, without having to ball gag everyone with the latest hype and trends that plagues the forums.  Like music, I like to create things I would want to hear/read.  There's nothing more worthless to me, than reading a review about a pedal, which the writer has owned for three days, and ultimately claims "X pedal is the best thing they've ever heard."  If this is the case, you were probably born yesterday.  Tastes change, you get interested in other music, yada yada.  So I'm creating an installment, if you will, where I'll highlight some of my favorite pieces of gear that I'm particularly attached to.  Most of it, I've had for a decent amount of time and still use fairly regularly.  Since I don't get any free gear via sponsorship, I can give an honest pro/con.  I hate the term "review", because that gives off the vibe that I plugged it in for a couple days and formed some silly opinion, rather than really putting something through the gauntlet.  So welcome to the first feature of Stonewall's Approved Gadgets.

I'd like to kick this off regarding a very popular item these days, the reverb pedal.  It seems to be an ever increasing trend of buying/selling/trading reverb units, to get that latest "Shimmer" or "Grandma's Bathroom" reverb sound.  Prices on these puppies are getting higher and higher too (Blue Sky $300, Space $500).  To me though, most reverbs are just boring as F%&$.  (*turns knobs* big space *turns knobs* little space)  I'm still trying to wrap my head around why everyone wants a dedicated modulated reverb (I do have a deep hatred for most Flanger sounds).  I have two requirements that I look for in modern reverbs, decent plate sound and on subtle reverbs, the effect doesn't wash out when a boost is engaged.  I don't know why, but most companies never get the latter requirement right.  Any other added features outside of those requirements I just consider a bonus.  I used to just resort to using amp reverb, which I sometimes forget to shut on and off for various songs during shows, and is a pain.  I also don't want to deal with extra cables from FX loops and footswitches.  Solution?

Electro Harmonix Cathedral

 I will start by saying no, this is not the greatest reverb ever.  But damn, it is cool.  I'm not going to explain what all the knobs do, you're a big kid, but let me give you the basics.  It does 7 different types of reverb that you can save one preset for each type, and an echo.  The "Infinite", is a momentary switch that will hold sound that it captures when you hit the switch until you let it go.  Sort of like the Freeze/Slow Gear pedal, but very different.

Pros

An old pedalboard shot from a short tour I did.

Obviously, I like this pedal because it covers my two requirements.  The Plate setting is very big sounding, which I love for that droney shit.  And on most of the reverb types, it doesn't wash out.  The Plate will wash, but that's just what happens with real Plate reverb anyways.  As long as I have one other type of small reverb sound to emulate amp reverb (knob set to maybe 1-2), I'm happy.  Most people use too much reverb, I like it subtle.  The Room setting does a good job of that.

Added bonuses:  Cheaper than most reverbs.  I think it's maybe $220 street price?  Snag one used for $150 and you're set.  That's the price of the ever-so-popular RV5, and unlike the RV5, it doesn't sound like crap.  Presets?  Awesome.  It's nice to be able to just save a couple different 'verbs and recall them quickly.  I'm lazy.  Having an extra delay is nice too.  It'll sort of (I say sort of, and I'll address that in the Cons) of knock out the need to have a simple digital delay on your board for long repeats.  The Reverse doesn't really work like how a Reverse Delay would, but I actually use this a lot for a long, 90% wet, droning sound.  Very This Will Destroy You sounding.

The "Infinite" feature is definitely my favorite bonus.  I own a Freeze and Superego, and I must say, I really like the way this "freezes" the sound more.  A)  It swells into the freeze, rather than lock it in right away.  Sounds more natural to my ears.  B)  You can use the momentary switch to control how fast you want to release, by repeatedly releasing the switch for a couple moments at a time.  Like easing on the break in a car.  Again, more natural sounding than just killing the sound.  

The pedal is also built like a tank.  Which is actually pretty strange, because I've had a number of build issues with EHX stuff before.  This pedal has seen tons of shows, and I've even dropped it a couple times (yeah, like you've never done that).  Still works great.  As lame as this sounds, the graphic is pretty cool too.  

Cons

Since the goal isn't for me to gloss over the nasty stuff, here are a number of things that I wish could be improved about this pedal.  It's got the old Holy Grail algorithm as one of the preset types.  Which means all the old problems the Holy Grail had such as, being useless after 12 o' clock, volume drop, etc.  Again, some of the reverb types will wash out, which is really frustrating.  It basically means I can't use that reverb unless I don't anticipate doing any sort of gain staging.  But like I said, a majority of reverbs have this problem so I just choose to deal with it on this specific unit.  There's also a slight volume dip on a couple reverbs, especially the Accu Spring.  

As I eluded to before, the Echo is nice, but isn't very good.  For some reason it doesn't "cut through" very well.  I had heard about delays having this issue, but I've never really had this problem with any of the ones I owned, so it was very noticeable discovery for me.  Even if you turn the Blend (aka Depth) way up, it seems to duck out regardless.  I don't really use the delay much due to this (not that I really needed another delay).  

My final real complaint is that the white selector knob can be a bit sensitive.  Meaning if you're playing a show and the pedal is bumped too hard, it'll bypass your preset to whatever the knobs are at.  I end up just taping it down.  Not really a big issue, you just have to watch out for it.  

Improvements?

The last two "issues" I'll talk about, are more recommendations than cons.  I wish this pedal (actually any reverb) had a spillover circuit.  I'd like to turn it off and have the sound decay out naturally vs. stopping abruptly.  I actually have a looper on my board, just so I can sample short segments of this, and slowly fade it out, cause of this problem (some delays do this too).  I know that would require the pedal to "lose" its True-Bypass, but you're a child if you really believe all of your pedals need to be True Bypass.

Also, it would be super amazing if someone (Walrus audio?) offered a mod, so you could have an expression pedal control the "Infinite" function.  That way you could control the swell in and out better.  Not necessary but it'd be convenient.  

Anyways.  There are so many cool usable things about this pedal that I just love.  I've had since it came out, and I've used it on everything I've done ever since.  I think I tried to sell it once, but I put it at a stupid high price so no one would buy it (a big indicator that you really don't want to let something go).  I don't really care whether it has a Shimmer effect or not.  I tried a pedal with them shimmers, and I could never really use that sound in a musical context (it's harder than you think without sounding cheesy).  I've never been so blown away by more expensive pedals that I've felt the need to make an "upgrade".  If you're selling a $500 reverb, it should sound/have features that are $300 better than my $200 reverb.  I'm intrigued by the Eventide space, but it's way too much to shell out for.  So I just stick with what works.

- Stonewall

The Bane of My Existence: Sound Guys

I'm going to go on a bit of a rant, and I expect it will be slightly more grumpy than usual.

Unfortunately, my "normal life" has caught up with me, and my habit of blowing off responsibility has been put on hold.  My work has recently hosted a very large conference, and being an audio nerd, I was appointed the pretend title, "Head of A/V".  The beauty of this position, is that if all things go well, I don't have to do anything.  The curse, is that when the ever-lurking chaos strikes, everyone is looking at you to fix it.  So, blending a little bit of obsessive compulsive with my love technology, I set out to cover every angle for any disaster that could happen.  I reserved equipment, double checked reservations, recruited sound people, bought five of every possible adapter, dongle, and cable I could think of.  D-Day finally arrived, and I felt more confident about my preparation than ever.  Aside from a few minor user errors, things went very smoothly both Monday and Tuesday during the pre conference workshops.  My confidence evolved into cockiness, and I was sure this event would go off without a hitch.  

However, there is an epidemic that is directly related, but stretches far beyond our music community.  This epidemic is known as the Sound Man.  The idea of a sound man is wonderful.  A professional attentive to all things audio (usually video too), and to to deal with these issues as they appear.  Ideally, this person would also be someone who has a good ear for mixing, dynamics, quality of sound, the room, and have a good idea how to actually use their equipment.  But in reality, 80% of the population of sound men I've met, have absolutely no clue what they are doing.  What's even worse are sound guys who do know how to run the show, but are a entitled lazy sacks of shite.  Whether the sound man be "good" or "terrible", you almost always have to suck up.  Why?  Cause they'll make your experience a living hell if you don't.

I know many of you are beginning to grumble, and some are even plastering their computer monitors in frothy saliva from all of the F-bombs spewing forth from your mouths.  In no way am I implying that I am the golden poster child to be worshiped for my audio glory.  I like you, am learning more about this every day.  But, I have had the luxury of working with extremely talented and professional sound guys.  And in comparison, it's a night and day difference.

Let us return to my original story.  We had rented out a very nice auditorium, for a simple keynote lecture that was to be given.  One microphone, one channel, a projector, and a Power Point all hardwired.  They were to provide all the equipment and staff, we just had to show up.  Simple.  A job you could probably even have a slightly agitated Wolverine fulfill with success.  I arrived early, politely introduced myself, and met all of the A/V people.  I scope out the person who looked most in charge of the event, let's call him Randy.  I notice that there are a bunch of hanging microphones that are hanging in front our our screen.  I ask if they can be moved, and why they weren't in the first place.  "It's a lot of work to get them down, people will ignore them".  Good excuse I suppose.  I shrug it off.  I then ask Randy who I need to give my flash drive to for the presentation.  He points upstairs to the second level, and tells me there's a lady waiting for it.  I give it to her.  No sweat.

A few minutes before the presentation starts, Randy asks me to test out my slide show.  I tell him I gave it to the woman upstairs.  I am met with a blank stare.  I reiterate our previous conversation, and how he instructed me to bring it to the second level to give to the woman at the computer.  He replies, "Oh, she's just filming the event, she has nothing to do with us."  Ok.  Just a hiccup I say to myself.  I retrieve my slide show and ask him where to plug it in.  "Oh, you don't have a computer?"  I become slightly annoyed now.  No, I don't have a computer Randy, because there happened to be a contract that said that the auditorium would provide one.  Guess you didn't read it.  But I don't say that.  Instead, while Randy picks lint out of his belly button, I hunt someone down with a laptop I can borrow.  And we bring it up to the podium to be hooked up with a VGA cable.

By this point, most of the auditorium is full.  We're about a minute away from kicking this off, and I'm up on stage scrambling around last minute like a chump.  Once hooked up, I check the slide show on the screen.  The image displays brightly for a minute, flickers, gives a standby signal, then flickers on.  I ask Randy if that problem will go away.  He informs me that he's never had this problem, so he doesn't know.  I tell him we probably need a VGA Signal booster, because it's most likely that the projector is getting a weak signal from the computer (the cable goes from the main floor all the way up to the ceiling.)  He shrugs his shoulders.

Shrugs his shoulders.

You wanna make this wombat foam at the mouth like a pestilent beast?  Tell me you're going to do a job, and when an issue comes up, shrug your shoulders....

So my fate was in Randy and his incompetent crew.  I spent a good five minutes trying to wave the man at the board down, so he could lift the mute on the mic.  Whatever was on his cell phone was much more important though.  The presentation itself went fine, minus the blinking projector for most of the lecture.  Eventually, another technology person found a signal booster tucked away and swapped the cables quickly.

We had three other presentations at this auditorium which all went very similarly.  This whole fiasco merely supports my previous grumpy stereotypes about most sound men.  I've played too many gigs with absolute morons standing behind the console.

- Stonewall

PS (I'm hoping to start posting regularly again)
PPS (The gentleman who wanted to look at my DL4 for me, please message me!)

"Studios"

I wish I was one of those people who could sit on a couch like a lethargic puddle of human existence.  I could pass my days away soaking in sitcoms, eating Bugles, and cleaning my belly button out at various points in the day.  But alas, I fall into the category of animal whose brain doesn't shut down, because every second must be injected with tedious work.  In a way, time has become my nemesis.  As soon as I wrap up a project, another much larger one looms in the distance.  More specifically, I have finally gathered the final pieces for my Guild S-100 project, and now I am left scratching my head on how to even approach my next assignment:  upgrading my "studio".

Before I get much into my project "studio", allow me to digress since studio related things have been the only thing on my mind as of late.  Since the innovation of computer recording, everyone thinks they are a "producer" or "audio engineer" these days.  When I worked music retail, I can't even begin to tell you the number of people who came in asking me how to "set up a studio so I can make beats with Fruity Loops".  Atrocious.  A woman I almost dated (during a time of extremely low self-esteem and chronic beer goggles), had once told me her ex had even owned a studio.  I soon discovered that this "studio" was merely a Behringer mixing board, hooked up to a couple of crappy computer speakers, with a computer patched into the board.  90% of these people who buy an MBox end up having it sit around because they are either too lazy, or much too dense to even try to learn to use it.  The other 10%, end up with shotty recordings and give it up.  Then there are the few, like myself, who wonder if we can actually try to make a decent recording.  Over the past 4-5 years I have become increasingly interested in building my own project "studio".  I use the term "studio" very lightly, because any real audio engineer would scoff at my over-glorified Mancave.  However, since I am not a neanderthal with a BR600, I am comfortable saying I have a project "studio".

I will say that I do not have any fantasies about becoming a world famous engineer/producer.  And I have no intention of expanding into a larger commercial outlet.  I mainly use my cave to get simple ideas down, track a few guitar/bass/piano sounds, and do a bit of arranging, do a demo for a friend.  But most importantly, progressively improve my sound. There are legitimate studios for more complex things (notice the " " is gone?).  Real studios have Telefunkens, Neumanns, UA compressors, and Neve consoles (whose recording prowess can only be attributed to the evil Ganondorf sealed away forever within the board).  If you're looking to record something serious, an album, single, soundtrack, or whatever, it's much smarter to invest your money somewhere where you can worry about the music, and they can worry about the sound.  I'm not trying to scare anybody, but it's much smarter to think about where you're investing a few thousand dollars before you do.  Yourself or a studio?  If you do build a studio, narrow it down to what you want to do with it. 

Anyhow.  The first and most important thing in a studio, even more so than gear and the engineer, is the room which you record and mix in.  Blows your mind doesn't it?  Blew mine at least.  The room is crucial because it's what reflects the sounds and noises that happen in the room.  Corners can suck up all of your bass, footsteps can bleed onto mics, and you can even get a false perception of a mix in a bad room.  So it's extremely important to "treat" your room.  And when I say "treat", I'm not talking about sound proofing the room so sound can't get out, I'm talking about controlling the frequencies within the room.  To be honest, I can give much advice here as of yet.  If you can afford it, have someone do it for you.  Due to my budget (or lack thereof), I can't afford to have someone plaster my walls in Auralex and pretty panels.  So, much of my "new" room will be very DIY.  I'll be taking photos and keeping you in the loop as I go about this process, and how to be a cheapass doing it.  Here is the room I will be working with:

The best thing to do is get someone's advice on where to start.  I've been poking around on a few forums and getting some ideas, but I ran across this.  You can send your room measurements to one of these big box online distributors and have them do all the planning for you.  Then instead of buying the expensive traps from them, I'll build the ones I can.  No, my room will not be perfect.  But I'm not recording drums or doing any epic live orchestration.  And if you look, concrete and plywood walls aren't that great either.  I'm just trying to make the best of what I have to work with.  I'll talk more about my game plan, gear, and provide a photo blog of the final S-100 project soon.

Cheers!

-  Stonewall

A Tribute to a Friend Passed: The DL4 Still Slays

Reality is sad, sad indeed.  Sad, because I'm about to blog about my sense of loss over material possessions.  Sad, because you're going to read this pathetic post.  But what's most sad, is my long lived Line 6 DL4 has kicked the bucket.  That big green echo monster was my baby, I've had it for 9+ years now.  There are many magic spaceship delays out there right now, and I'm sure there are some that make glitter and unicorns shoot out of your guitar's headstock, but the DL4 was my favorite delay.

I remember getting into guitar gadgets when I was a meaty, sweaty, angsty high school kid.  This mysterious emerald device kept showing up on pedalboards of my favorite guitarists.

Aaron Pill of The Appleseed Cast.  One of my favorite guitarists.
This photo's pretty damn old too.

I probably watched hundreds of YouTube videos about the pedal.  I had to have it...so the antagonizing began.  I was relentless and I never stopped talking my mother into buying it for me.  After over a year of unsuccessful murder attempts my mom plotted against me, she finally had to cave.  On Christmas morn, the glorious DL4 became mine.  Oh the delight I had in twirling its knobs, making whale sounds, and creating god awful feedback!  I used it in every band I've ever played in.  At one point (during a heavy Minus the Bear phase) I had borrowed a second one and had both on my board.

No.  The DL4 does not have the best sounding delay, nor the best features, and there are little annoyances (like the ever-so-common volume drop issue).  I love my DM3, Moog 104M, and I loved my DMM (before Howard Davis f*&#ed me over).  But like these other famous units, nothing else sounds quite like it.  It's not a pristine clean sounding digital delay, it has some quirks.  However, I've had phases where I just flat out didn't want to use it anymore because it was "outdated", I didn't have the $$$ to mod it, or other various pathetic excuses.  The Line 6 M series spaceships came out, promising all of the features of the DL4 but better!  I quickly acquired these devices, hoping they'd knock my DL4 out of the park and provide me with more shit I didn't need.  I've bought and sold both the M13 and M9 on at least two occasions.  They just didn't sound right to me.  They were "too perfect".  The Reverse and Auto Volume didn't sound right, and the new M Series Analog Delay setting didn't sound as dark as my DL4.  The Eventide and Strymon fads have come, and will go.  I've considered "upgrading" on multiple occasions.  Prior to my current debacle, these new units never really offered more realistically usable features than the DL4 did.  

My DL4 had burnt out once previously.  I used it for 8 years, then randomly it farted out last year.  The local prick who fixed it says I was using a "questionable means" to power it (One Spot + L6 Adapter = questionable?  Probably not).  $80 repair.  Pretty hefty cost since you can get them secondhand for well under $150 now.  But hey, it has sentimental value.  A couple weeks ago, I decided to bust it out again.  Plugged it in.  Lights came on.  Abnormally flashed a few times.  Then nothing.  I tried different cables.  I double checked the owners manual to my new power supply I've bought since the last burnout.  I tried a different power supply.  Nothing.  I've read on all the forums about static under the chip, hard resets, yada yada.  I've tried it all, it's toast.  I'm well beyond my warranty on it.  Another $80 doesn't sound too appealing.  So I feel like it's time to retire it.  (Unless someone wants to fix it up free :D  )  

Now I'm in a weird situation I haven't been in for years, what's going to replace it?  Not sure I want a second one yet.  It's like being single after a long relationship, except the end result will have less Crabs.

R.I.P. my little green friend.

-  Stonewall

The "Best" Overdrive

Lordy!  It has been quite some time.  I've been rather busy with various projects, so busy in fact, that I have yet to come up with a reasonable excuse for my absence.  To the few of you regular readers, I apologize for my absence.  Very soon I should have a nice photo blog of my 70's Guild S-100 project.  I just need to locate a bridge position Guild HB-1 and I'll be raring to go!

In the meantime, let me get back to some smug gear talk.  Probably the most common question I've ever been asked is, "Which overdrive is the best overdrive?"  If I was a prattling snob I'd tell you to get out your checkbook and buy an original Klon.   If I was a true TGP'er I'd probably tell you to buy my old dirt box, so I can leap on the next overly priced bandwagon dirt pedal.  But glory be!  This is Stonewall's Guide, not theirs!  First thing I'd like to clear up, is that there's no best dirt pedal.  If there was, we'd all have one and there would be one company.  That being said, your musical tastes will change and you may use one consistently for years and then one day, never use it again.  I used a Fulltone OCD as pretty much my only drive pedal for a long time.  I've recently gotten a new amp and now all I use is my Xotic RC Booster and my sweet sweet Orange amp breakup.  It's going to change, you'll have to get used to that.  However, don't get caught up in hype, or you're going to end up one of those people losing lots of nickels constantly buying and selling new "best pedals".

Pedals are a math equation.  Your playing/style + your guitar + your amp.  They all make a big difference on the sound that's finally going to come out of the speakers.  If I don't know you all that well, my first question is always going to be "What kind of music do you like to play?".  Please don't tell me that you like everything, that doesn't narrow things down at all.  What do you truly like to play?  Rock?  Blues?  2 Step Thrash?  All of those are going to make a difference.  Basically it helps me decide if you might be looking for something with lots of gain on tap, or just a little bit of drive.  This also tells me what kind of overdrive voicing you might like.  In a really oversimplified way there's really only two voicings, Modern and Vintage/Classic.  Modern voiced pedals are typically going to be much brighter and have a more scooped sound, which is very common in that racket you kids call "metal".  As you might guess, Classic/Vintage voiced overdrive will sound a tad darker, have a more pronounced mid range, and might be more raw sounding than edgy.  I will digress for a moment, and say that with so many boutique pedal makers there are plenty of pedals that can be vintage voiced with a scooped sound and vice versa. Some pedals even can do both with the flip of a switch.

The next bit of information I'll need to know is how you're going to use it.  Are you running a completely clean amp and using it for your rhythm sound?  Are you going to be blending any amp distortion/overdrive? Are you wanting to just massacre everyone in a 9 mile radius with your Big Muff?  Some pedals don't stack well, meaning, they sound like shit with other dirt pedals or amp distortion.  (A Merriam Webster definition of course).  Stacking is a whole 'nother ball game I'm probably going to save for a later post.  It can get complicated because it depends on what order you have your stack, how you're running each one, etc.  We're just talking about "best overdrive" here.  The final piece of the puzzle is what amp you're using.  Clean Fender-esque amp?  Pushed class A amp?  Crunchy British amp?

Here are a few recommendations that've worked for me.  They may or may not work for you, but it would be selfish of me to withhold my experience.  I haven't tried everything, but I have tried more than my fair share.  Don't take my lack of examples as lack of experience.  I only recommend the "shining stars" that come immediately to mind.  The best drives, in my humble opinion, are the ones you can get at least 3 different usable sounds out of.  There's no bigger pain in the ass than bumping the setting and feather touching the knobs to get that non existent "sweet spot".  (Guess what?  You turn your amp up or down and that "sweet spot" moves around or disappears).  I tend to prefer "Vintage" voiced pedals, but I used to love that "Modern" sound.  Both have their place in music, you just have to use your ears.

On Clean High Headroom Amps
Fender amps are fairly "neutral" sounding to me, which makes them a great platform for using dirt pedals for different colors of drive.  Since amps like a Twin or a Hot Rod series amp have lots of headroom, they also provide a great platform to use the full range of gain in a pedal.  High headroom prevents lots of natural clipping; or the amp being overdriven/compressed on its own.  Once an amp starts to overdrive by itself, there's only so much gain you can work with before that gain knob just turns into a noisy mess.  This is what worked for me:

-  Wampler pedals:  The large amount of headroom allows the "amp in a box" Wampler pedals to really shine.  Given, you're not gonna turn your Hot Rod Deville into a Mesa Rectifier, but you'll still have a better platform to work with than say, a Vox.  They offer a pretty wide selection of tones, but I really bonded with the Black 65 and the Pinnacle.  The JHS stuff claims to do the same thing, but to me sounds like nasally shit.
-  Fulltone OCD:  It's based on a Marshall circuit, I used this for years.  I like the Fulltone stuff.
-  Tubescreamer Variants:  Although TS circuits aren't my cup of tea, they really fatten up a Fender.  Fender amps lack midrange, and a TS has a mid hump, making it an obvious choice.
-  Proco Rat (only with LM308 chip):  If you want to sound like old Sabbath get this.  The models without the LM308 chip sound thin and fizzy to me.
-  Visual Sound Jekyll and Hyde:  These pedals are underrated.  Despite the ugly triangle (even uglier on current versions) they sound great.  Provides you with a TS circuit on one side, and a nice distortion on the other.

On Class A Amps
All you need to know about Class A amps for this post, is that they have a different power section, which in turn creates less headroom for you to work with.  (If you want to know more about Class A, Mesa has posted a nice little article about most of the differences).  Due to the lack of headroom, your amp will break up nicely without having to kill everyone at the volumes you'd be playing at with a non Class A amp.  A Vox AC15 or a Mesa Lonestar Special are great examples of a Class A amp.  Most people who buy these types of amps do so, because they want this type of natural drive/compression.  So if you've got this nice creamy  drive, why would you muck it up with an "amp in a box" pedal?  You can, but I'm not a fan.  I like to simply blend a more transparent drive, or simply boost the amp to get more gain from the amp itself.  If you boost the right frequencies on these amps, you can get a nice warm fat sound.  If you boost the wrong ones, you'll get an ice pick in the ear.  Here are some recommendations:

-  Xotic RC Booster:  Does a nice job of getting more dirt out of a Class A amp, while leaving the natural tone of the amp intact.  The Gain on the pedal itself blends very nicely without taking over the show.
-  Durham Sex Drive:  Same deal as the RC Booster, just with the ability to choose a Raw, Soft, or Hard Compression within the boost.
-  Fulltone OCD:  If you turn the Volume up to 2 or 3 o clock, and the Gain down to maybe 9, you can get a nice crunchy rhythm tone.  A lot of people recommend the Hot Cake for amps like an AC30, but I much preferred the OCD because it wasn't as fizzy.
-  Klon:  If you know what a Klon is, you can feel however you want about it.  I like it.  It's a Swiss Army knife for either a little grit or just a boost.  It's not my go to, but it sure makes a Class A amp sounds pretty.
-  Fuzz Face Variant:   I think FF's sound incredible when blended with some natural amp drive.  It makes 'em warm and fat. (Everything a man looks for in a lady).  I had great success with Analogman products and the new version of the Fulltone '70 (the old one sounds like shit).
-  Muffs:  A Muff can be brutal sonic mayhem, but like the FF I think they sound best when blended with a little drive.  I personally like the Wren and Cuff stuff, but I've heard Mojo Hand has been making some great clones as well.  You'll have to look online at the different types of muffs (probably shouldn't search that word at work) to find the kind that suits you best.

For Those High Gain Fiends
If you asking me, and you're wanting to play high gain/heavy music, buy an amp that's gonna get you there.  Although I don't dabble in the black, hairy, unshowered corners of music anymore, I learned quickly that there's no pedal that will ever do it right.  Some do an okay job, and will get you by if you're not wanting to dish out.  But, do you really think a little metal box with transistors can do a better job than 15 glowing KT88's?  If you didn't buy that $250 boutique "Mesa in a box", you could have saved up a few more bucks on gotten yourself a used Sovtek MIG, Read Bear, or 5150 secondhand that would leave you feeling more satisfied.

You can blend drive pedals with these types of amps, but once you reach a threshold of distortion you're either gonna get lots of buzz or not as much buzz.  You should sit down with a well produced metal record and listen to how "distorted" the guitars are, not as much as you think.  If you really need a little push, this is what I'd recommend:
-  Turn the Gain halfway down on your amp and try some pedals and see if you like the blended drives more than your amp alone.  If you do this, Muffs and FF's come back into the picture and they'll actually be usable.
-  TS Variant:  Turn the Gain down (or even off) and turn the volume up on the pedal.  It'll have the same effect as those Class A amps, but you can use the tone knob to color your drive without adding unnecessary gain from the actual pedal.
-  EQ or Clean Boost:  When you're dealing with lots of distortion, it's all about hearing the right frequencies. The audio engineers out there will appreciate this advice, don't always boost frequencies.  If you find that you  want more Treble, cut some Bass.  If you cut frequencies to enhance others, you'll get much less noise and your signal will be "cleaner".



This obviously was a very short overview.  It'll at least get you looking at videos deciding which ones work best for you.  I'm obviously biased, but it's been based on what's worked for me.  If you want a recommendation, feel free to drop a comment.  Although they won't throw me shillings for this, I would recommend checking out the Pro Guitar Shop, "Demo It Live" service on their site.  It allows you to hear various pedals through your amp so you can get an idea how they'll work for you.

Until next time,

Cheers!

- Stonewall

Help Yourself Out Without Spending a Dime

I apologize for the long absence from Stonewall's Guide, I was taking some much needed time off for a short vacation in Las Vegas.  I visited a fantastic guitar shop called Cowtown Guitars, and I was blown away by this small little store.  Cowtown had an excellent selection of interesting and vintage guitars, and the staff was extremely knowledgeable.  (I will post a couple photos later, since I foolishly do not have photos from my trip on this computer).  Since my return from the land of debauchery, I've been working on a few projects (both music and guitar related) that I've had to catch up on.  I've got a few posts in the near future that should be pretty interesting such as a Guild S-100 restoration and possibly a video demo.

Anyhow, I'd like to dabble with a topic I've been thinking about a lot lately, which is improving your presence as a musician, without spending a dime (or very few).  Since the baby boom of the Guitar Hero generation, it's difficult to discern the wanking turds from the young musicians who are actually pleasant to work with.  Unless you aspire be a Prattler, sitting alone in your dark bedroom playing with yourself (music, you perv), you're going to have to go outside and meet a few people.  This means networking.  Here are a few tips on how to make yourself less of a schmuck:

Make Yourself Searchable

Raise your hand if you've ever been perusing the local Craigslist and ran across an ad that read:  "I'm looking for X person to play on my record/in my band!  If you know how to get in touch with X, please email me!".  I've never had to post that, so I don't know what the success rate is.  But as a musician you should never make people do that, or you're probably going to miss out on a gig aka extra cash.  Even something as simple as having some form of social media (Facebook, Twitter, MySpace (is that still alive?), etc.) will allow someone to search for and find you.  Make it simple too.  What if I wanted to hire Nels Cline or Eric Heywood?  Glory Be!  Their websites are (their name).com!  See what I'm sayin'?  

If you've got a few extra bucks, make a web page.  The nice thing about the modern world, is you don't have to know squat about web programming to create a page anymore.  Personally, I recommend Squarespace.com.  They have great layouts, and most everything is just drag and drop.  It's $8/month and you can have it charge you monthly or annually, and you can also use your own custom domain name.  Skip eating out twice a month and it's already paid for itself.  Make it look good too.  There's nothing more frustrating than having a bad site that lacks photos and audio.  For all of you groaning right now about how bad you are at designs, shoot me a comment or email mscaseyadams@gmail.com for free graphic design.  (It's not me, sorry).  She does excellent work and right now she's free, (simply because she's new).  So you have no excuses.  Last thing for all you old school dudes out there, if you don't want to deal with the internet, you better damn well get a business card and at least an email.  Preferably with your name on it, phone number, email, and not some silly made up business ("Pickin' Pete's Professional Audio".)  

And put some sounds on your site!  People need to hear you in order to like you!

Communication

Learn to be a good communicator.  I hate, Hate, HATE, it when I send an email to a musician/venue and I get a reply weeks or even months later.  The ship will most likely have left by that point.  If you're inquiring about joining a band, follow up.  If you're leaving a project, give them a good notice, fulfill all final commitments, and always leave on a good note.  Those people are your references when you try to join something new.  

Remember, the people you work with are your reputation in town.  Leave them with good things to say.

Communicate with fans or people who even remotely care about your band.  Even if it's your family.  If someone sends you a message, reply.  It's so simple, but it's unbelievable how many people neglect this.  Be courteous too, these people are your audience and payroll.  

Getting Other Musicians Into the Sack

Hey, we all wouldn't be musicians if we weren't a little socially awkward.  So how do you find other people to play with?  I guarantee if you do some looking, you can find at least a couple free shows with no cover.  You should go out even if you think the band sucks (play some pool or something).  I've met dozens of new people by enjoying a cheap beer (always Molson's for me) and making fun of the band.  Don't be straightforward about getting them in your band within the first 10 minutes, cause you'll be wearing awkward pants before you know it.  It's never worked for getting ladies, and it won't work on musicians either, sorry.  If you're serious about it, share a pitcher.  The time it takes this person to drink approx. 2.5 beers will be more than enough to get into a conversation.  Ask them what kind of music they play, bands they've played in, etc.  If they sound cool, just ask to jam.  No commitments.  Don't spew your life story over the first pitcher either.  There have been more than a few times I was interested in playing with someone, and then I was just creeped out by family issues and weird fetishes.  Keep the music in music.  

Most music stores have listings on a message board to meet people.  So check those once a month.  Craigslist is very hit or miss, but it's been known to work.  I actually met my current bassist of 5 years via Craigslist.  However, we have met half a dozen jabronis that route as well.  Use your discretion.

Practice

Be smart about your extra time if you're not doing anything.  You want to be prepared when opportunities come up.  Don't play what you already know, actually learn something new.  I watched an interview with Captain Kirk of the Roots and one thing that pierced my brain was:  "If you're practicing and you sound good, you're not practicing correctly."  I'm not going to get too into detailed about this, because there are countless resources and tips for this.  If you don't know how to practice, go here:  http://musicdiscipline.com/

Finally,

For Gosh Sake, Stop Whining

This makes me want to pull my hair out.  Don't whine.  Don't make excuses.  I don't do it so much anymore, but we all do it from time to time.  However, I have two guitar friends in particular that are quick to sully me if I begin to whine.

Common examples:

Excuse:  I don't have good enough gear to (make a recording/play in this project/play a show/etc.).

Answer:  Gear doesn't dictate anything, and don't let the smug players tell you that it does.  No one is expecting you to roll in with a Private Reserve PRS and a Dumble for an audition.  If you do, you darn well better have some chops.  

Excuse:  I don't know how to (sing/play this solo/write a song/etc.)

Answer:  Then learn.  All it's gonna do is broaden your musicianship.  Yeah, you're going to suck at first.  But if you refer to the bold face "practice" heading above, you can find the answers to the test.  Comment if you want recommendations.  I won't leave you high and dry.

Excuse:  I don't have a band, so there's nothing I can do.

Answer:  Nope.  You can learn how to write a song.  If you're not the songwriting type, get better at your instrument.  If you're satisfied (which you should never be), learn a new instrument.  You need to learn sooner than later how to work with and without people.  

Hopefully you can pull a grain of advice from some of this this.  

Cheers!

-  Stonewall